• Grey Facebook Icon
  • Grey Twitter Icon
  • Grey YouTube Icon
  • Grey Instagram Icon

© 2017 Zamurai Productions

CONTACT

Zamurai Productions

michael@zamuraiproductions.com

Sword Fights Inc.

www.swordfightsinc.com

(818) 209-6543

lyrics

“I’M DEADPOOL”

Parody of “You’re Welcome” from “Moana”

 

DEADPOOL:

Oh, I see what's happening here

You're face to mask with Deadpool

and you're scared

 

You feel your knees start to shake

Did you just piss?!

You faceless goons are always unprepared

 

Meet my two girls, let's be clear

Yes, it's me! Dwayne Johnson

Eyes up here

 

I know it's a lot - the black, the red

But it's to hide the blood

when you're all dead!

 

So, what can I say except: I'm Deadpool!

With my swords, these guns, you'll die!

 

You'd better pray it's okay, I'm Deadpool!

I'm just your friendly neighborhood fucked-up-guy!

 

GUARD:

It's Deadpool!

 

DEADPOOL:

Yup, I'm Deadpool!

 

VOICES:

Maximum effort?

HELL YEAH!

 

DEADPOOL:

Man, honestly, I could go on and on

Actually, I'm a mutated phenomenon

The strength, the bod to boot

Doesn't my junk look great in this suit?

 

I hit this guy, right in the nuts

Why do the fans seem to like that so much?

Don't need a hammer, don't need a gamma ray

I'll make you laugh as I'm taking your life away

 

Damage the suit and reveal my skin

Look at this leg coming off at the shin

The merc with the mouth always knows what to say

Hey, look at these dudes 'cause they're coming my way

 

And it's hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey!  Ow!  Ow! Five Nights At FUCK YOU, buddy!

 

GUARD:

Let it go...  Let it go...? 

 

DEADPOOL:

...MY musical.

 

DEADPOOL/VOICES:

[He's Deadpool!]

I'm Deadpool!

[He's Deadpool!]

I'm Deadpool!

[He's Deadpool!]

I'm Deadpool!

Thank you, uh thank you very much.

 

“PART OF A TEAM”

A Parody of “Part Of Your World” from “The Little Mermaid”

 

DEADPOOL:

Maybe she's right… Maybe there is something wrong with me.

 

JUBILEE:

Oh, seriously?

 

DEADPOOL:

Look at these kills, aren't they neat

all by myself forty fucks met defeat

 

JUBILEE:

Oh, god.

 

DEADPOOL:

Wouldn't you think I'm the merc

Merc who has everything?

 

JUBILEE:

I'm gonna be sick.

 

DEADPOOL:

Look at you, Wade

Why does it seem

You're all alone never part of a team

Looking around here you'd think

Yeah, well... he's got hobbies.

 

BLIND AL:

Yeah, jerkin' off.

 

DEADPOOL:

I've got pistols and plushies aplenty

I've got ammo and fleshlights galore.

You want thingamabombs?

I've got twenty!

...oh, SHIT!

 

But a team?  Do I want?

I'm not sure...

 

I wanna be where the heroes are!

I wanna be tag teaming the bad guys

Rolling around with that wheelchair bound Mr. Clean!

 

Breaking fourth walls only goes so far

Guns are required for shooting, blasting

Then time to change, what's that word again?

Oh... magazine!

 

Teamed up with Cap, Wolvie or Chuck

I'd even work with Howard the Duck!

 

Just wait and see

I'll prove I can be

Part of A-TEAM

 

DEADPOOL:

"A-Team". 80's Reference.  The kids love that.

 

BLIND AL:

You are such an asshole.

 

“NO CHANCE IN HELL”

A Parody of “Belle” from “Beauty And The Beast”

 

DEADPOOL:

Maybe a chance that I could  join the X-Men?

You know I'd help your movies sell!

Good to see you again

Thought Anna packed it in

 

X-MEN:

Please let us be, there's just no chance in hell!

 

DEADPOOL:

ROGUE! So, how about a little skin-on-skin contact?

 

ROGUE:

UGH!  Ya'll thought this was a bright idea?

 

BEAST:

He doesn't even have an X-Men uniform.

 

DEADPOOL:

BEAST! So meta. So, Belle still giving you blue... everything?

 

CYCLOPS:

Look alive, X-Men! 

 

DEADPOOL:

Logan, if you wanted someone to impale you-

 

WOLVERINE:

GET OUT OF MY WAY!

 

DEADPOOL:

Hey Jubilee!  We'd get cool matching earrings

We'd do some fastballs, that'd be swell!

Scratch my Beast, I'll scratch yours

 

BEAST:

My stars and garters, you've got sores!

 

X-MEN:

Oh, please won't you just let us be!

We're begging you, Wade, just let us be!

There's absolutely just no chance...

...in hell!

 

X-MEN:

Good DAY!  

Get lost!

Fuck you!

Go home!

Good bye!

YOU SUCK!

 

 

“A WHOLE NEW TEAM”

A Parody Of “A Whole New World” from “Aladdin”

 

DEADPOOL:

I can show you my sword

 

IRON MAN:

Um, stop trying to steer me, Wade.

 

DEADPOOL:

And I don't mean my katana

 

IRON MAN:

Dickjoke. Groundbreaking.

 

DEADPOOL:

Tell me, Tony, now when did you last

Let this merc inside?

 

IRON MAN:

Avengers, I need backup.

 

BLACK WIDOW

A whole new team!

DEADPOOL:

Don't you dare close your thighs.

 

IRON MAN:

Not what I meant, Natasha.

 

BLACK WIDOW:

Another man to take screen time!

DEADPOOL:

Just pretend that I'm Pepper.

 

THE AVENGERS:

This cast is far too large

Not Rated R

To let this whackjob

Join our team today!

 

NICK FURY:

What part of no singing on this motherfuckin' channel DON'T you people get?

 

CAPTAIN AMERICA:

Language.

 

NICK FURY:

TONY.  Drop that bitch.

 

IRON MAN:

Uh, yeah... Give it a couple years, kid.

 

DEADPOOL:

Oh... shiiiiiiiiiiit!

 

 

 

“BE A TEAM”

A Parody Of “Make A Man Out Of You” from “Mulan”

 

PUCK:

Let's get down to business!

To defeat The Hand!

Hordes of faceless bad guys

From a ninja clan!

 

DEADPOOL:

Thanks for the exposition, Puck

And for making true my dream

 

ALL:

Puck and Wade

And Sasquatch!

We're a team!

 

DEADPOOL:

What the shit?

 

ROGUE & JUBILEE:

I guess we're here to help you now

To beat up all these shogun!

 

BLACK WIDOW:

Don't know if we're friends or I'm a fool.

 

DEADPOOL:

With benefits!?

 

WOLVERINE:

What's this asshole up to now?

 

DEADPOOL:

Welcome back, zombie Logan!

 

SPIDER-MAN:

Guess it's time for me to show up too!

 

DEADPOOL:

SPIDEYPOOL!!

 

ALL:

Be a team!

The baddest team-up in Marvel history

Be a team!

Please turn this dead guy into a meme

Be a team!

What happens now that we're owned by Disney?

(pause)

Fighting together, we're all part of a team!

 

Be a team!

A band of misfits with super powers

Be a team!

So overpowered it's almost cruel

Be a team!

Magneto trembles and Thanos cowers

Win, then go get shawarma

Without Deadpool!